Also they are the only true source of what is really going on in any court. Want the dirt about the latest plans for new court building? Which judge is moving up and which moving down? Get to know the usher. He or she will know much more than the presiding judge.

And as for bad jokes. Well it was an usher who told me the “Care Proceedings” joke.

“Two neighbours are talking about their children. One asks the other what her children are called. “Wayne” she replies.
But you have 7 boys says the first woman. They’re not all Wayne are they? Oh yes says the second woman, it’s much simpler that way. If I’m serving dinner I just go to the door and shout “Wayne” and they all come in. If I want them to get up in the morning I just yell “Wayne” and they all get up.
Well I suppose so says the first woman dubiously but what if you only want one of them?
Oh that’s easy. I just call their father’s name.”